Incognito

I never seem to find time to write anymore.  Ever since I became mobile, exploration is at the top of my agenda.  Keeping the world informed of my latest adventures obviously is not. 

Recently, I took a trip to the Seoul Zoo.  A day before this excursion, I told Locke (tiger), Albert (bear), and Mountbatten (elephant) where I was planning on going.  I should have never told them.  For thirty minutes, I had to listen to stories about "cousins."  Apparently, Locke has a French cousin who goes by the pseudonym Voltaire, and he's currently doing time there.  Albert's cousin Henry (thrice removed) has met a girl there -- Victoria.  Mountbatten's cousins, Kipling and Rudyard, haven't written in years.  All correspondence stopped after Mountbatten refused to send a metal file.  Ohhhh....the stories went on and on.

On the morning that I was leaving for the zoo, I put on my overalls and safari hat.  I looked like a dapper lad, ready for my adventure. 

Well, I was just out the door when Locke shouted, "Not so fast, short stuff!  We have something for you!"

I turned around to see a large duffel bag.  "What in the wild world of sports is that?"

Locke replied, "Shhhhhhhhhh!  It's all top-secret stuff that you need to deliver to our cousins at the zoo!"

I unzipped the bag to find a bazillion items: files, bolt cutters, peanut butter, wrenches, rope, honey, camo, calling cards, a mysterious tonic (African Shrinking Potion), maps, grease, pens, paper, hedge clippers, and a bag of York Peppermint Patties.

Locke saw me looking at the peppermint and sighed, "Yeah ummm, Albert insisted on those -- Henry's favorite."

I couldn't conceal my surprise, "Dang, Locke, where the heck have y'all been hiding all of this?  More importantly, where did you get all of this stuff?  Don't tell me Dad's toolbox."

Mountbatten strolled up around this time.  He answered my questions with a shrug.  "Secret stash, kid.  Koreans will trade anything for cheetohs and frankfurters." 

I took the bag and stuffed it into my stroller.  I was on a secret mission -- incognito!  I love that word --"incognito."  I don't really know what it means, but I'm hoping to impress Mom and Dad one day by using it frequently. 

Delivering the goods to the cousins was a little tricky.  I was with a large group of friends, and I didn't want them suspicious.  We didn't get to see Voltaire.  But, a red-reared monkey in desperate need of Desitin or Boudreaux's Butt Paste insisted that he knew Voltaire personally.  He swore that he'd deliver the stuff.  Right!  I told him that if he didn't, my tiger would eat him for a snack.  Strangely, this monkey spoke English with a Russian accent.  

Success!