THE JACKPACK

onsidering the title of this entry, you're probably thinking, "Oh great, a blog about a boring museum.  He's probably going to describe the exhibits in lengthy detail.  By the time he's done, I'll want to stick a fork in my eye."  No, no, this wasn't that type of museum.  This museum was for midget types like me -- for little guys like me who have the attention spans of a puppy. Dad says "goldfish" or "fly," but that's a complete insult to my evolutionary progress.  At least, puppies are cute, and people generally agree that dogs are "intelligent."  They're much more intelligent than tigers, bears, and cranes. [dodging a punch from Albert]  Notice I didn't add elephants. [Mountbatten knocking the ever-loving out of Albert]  Back to my discussion about the museum.....sheesh. Yes, it was the Seoul Children's Museum, and I went there on Wednesday.  Now, I have harshly criticized the Koreans for their filthy co...

In preparation for my journey back to the good ol' US of A, I have a new seat.  And, if you thought leather made you feel important, you should try faux-suede.  My new Sunshine Kids Radian 65 is one of the best of the best.  I got to test it out today.  I know Dad's seat usually comes with a handle in the middle.  I was under the impression that mine would have one too.  Plus, I think Dad's has a cool survival pack and parachute.  I'm still looking for these cool gadgets.  After all, I need to find that handle before I get in the car with a female behind the wheel.  (just kidding, just kidding.....or am I?  Well, I'm outta here.  I'll let Mom deal with the feminazis.) Shoot, Where is that Ejection Handle?!!?

So, I often write about how filthy it is in this place.  And, sure, it is.  That's why Korea is probably not listed in the "Top Ten" of tourist destinations.  But, I must admit that the cherry blossoms and dogwood trees sure are nice in the spring.  They are everywhere.  So, that's as "sensitive" and girly as this post is going to get.  Sheesh.  Mom should write the post on cherry blossoms, etc.  Cripes.  She's the one so impressed by them.

A while back, I had a request from a "fan" that I post more pictures of places "outside the wire."  This past weekend, Dad, Mom, Uncle T, and I ran some errands just outside the front gate.  It's an area that caters to Americans.  It seems that every shop "downtown" is either owned by a tailor, handbag salesman, or junkmonger.  As I've mentioned in previous posts, it's difficult to capture the atmosphere.  I'd say the overwhelming element is filth.  Though the area is not terribly old, the buildings are soiled from pollution.  It's colorful.  It's quirky.  It's safe.  It's bustling with _____ (you name it). Motorcycles, bicycles, and cars drive quickly down the alleyways, completely oblivious to pedestrians/strollers/dogs/cats/ (again,you name it).  Recently, I overheard Mom tell Dad that she will never wear sandals downtown.  That's probably wise.  Sometimes, Mom leaves the stroller in the entryway, and since I'm ...

I went swimming today at the pool and convinced Mom that she must find me a flotation device equally as good or better than the one that Brooklyn has....[nodding off....]....one that has a....[nodding off]......a.....[nodding off]....like the... [zzzzzzzz...snoring....zzzzzzz....passed out after a morning of swimming....half-eaten bagel dangling out of mouth....zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz]

Have I mentioned that Korea deserves the "Quirkiness" Award?  Well, it does.  Now, here's to the best quirk!  If I'm hungry, tired, or simply need a tidy nappy, Mom is bound to find one of these: a Korean "nursing" room.  Oh boy, they've got glittery, colorful walls.  They're super-clean.  They've got very nice changing tables....  Each one is basically a five-star temporary accommodation.  Some even have very nice cribs.  I would like to emphasize how clean these places are.  It's ironic, considering how dadgum filthy this country generally is. Now, cheers for the worst of the quirks!  Here's how soap is dispensed in public restrooms in Korea -- airports, zoos, stores....clean bathrooms, filthy bathrooms, mediocre bathrooms, stinky bathrooms.... Yep, soap "dispensation" at it's finest!  I like to share my bar soap with one of the world's most populated metropolitan areas. 

Spring is upon us.  Finally, I no longer need to bundle up in my snowsuit or freeze my eyeballs while cruising.  This is my first "spring," and I'm enjoying seeing some color in my world.  The "forest" that I see outside our living room window is starting to transform from a gray land of sticks to something a little more appealing to the eye.  I even noticed an "alien" bird the other day. So, 'bout this "alien."  It was a quiet morning.  I was casually sipping some Enfamil, staring at the railing on our "veranda."  That's when I noticed some movement out of the corner of my eye.  What the heck?  It was a bird -- definitely related to my flamboyant flamingo and smarter than average sand crane.  But, this dude looked dangerous.  And, he was traveling with camo-clad guardsmen.  I high-tailed it over to Mountbatten.  He would know what it was.  Mountbatten just laughed, "Oh man, that's a pheasant.  Ewww, he's ...

I never seem to find time to write anymore.  Ever since I became mobile, exploration is at the top of my agenda.  Keeping the world informed of my latest adventures obviously is not.  Recently, I took a trip to the Seoul Zoo.  A day before this excursion, I told Locke (tiger), Albert (bear), and Mountbatten (elephant) where I was planning on going.  I should have never told them.  For thirty minutes, I had to listen to stories about "cousins."  Apparently, Locke has a French cousin who goes by the pseudonym Voltaire, and he's currently doing time there.  Albert's cousin Henry (thrice removed) has met a girl there -- Victoria.  Mountbatten's cousins, Kipling and Rudyard, haven't written in years.  All correspondence stopped after Mountbatten refused to send a metal file.  Ohhhh....the stories went on and on. On the morning that I was leaving for the zoo, I put on my overalls and safari hat.  I looked like a dapper ...

Everyone occasionally has one of those weekends that is so incredibly eventful that when it's over, the person spends the work week recovering from the fun.  That was my Easter Weekend.  Luckily, my job permits me two siestas a day.  So, I'm slowly but surely recharging for my next blast of amusement.  Easter Weekend began with a squadron egg hunt.  The Easter Rabbit apparently decided to hide a bazillion eggs on a soccer field.  He even hid them "age appropriately."  The bigger kids hunted for eggs on the playground.  On the other hand, midgets like me suffered an insult to our intelligence. The Easter Rabbit strategically placed our eggs in plainsight on the astroturf soccer field.  Seriously. But, I did enjoy racing around the soft "grass."  Dad hunted the eggs with me.  If Dad had hidden the eggs, I bet I'd get to carry a metal detector and hire me some hounds.  It would be a bit more stimulating. After t...