The Attack of the Blob

On Friday, it happened.  That morning, in the distance, I spotted a horde of barbaric invaders.  It looked as though a ferocious, green blob were oozing on the horizon.  I leapt from my high chair and sounded the alarm, but it was too late.  My phagocytes were watching the Super Bowl and consuming large quantities of buffalo wings.  The mast cells were celebrating MLK Day.  The basophils decided to party outside the wire the night before and were suffering from the effects of inebriation.  They tried to talk my liver cells into offering some relief.  They didn't oblige.  To say the least, my security had been compromised by the very ineptitude of my own so-called "defense system."  Irritating beyond irritating.  (Come to find out they all speak French...) 

You ask where I have been and why I haven't been writing.  Well, considering what happened on Friday, I've had to single-handedly defeat this mass of infectious agents, aka the dreaded Rhinovirus.  Initially, I deployed a flame thrower, which caused minimal casualties amongst the enemy.   What has really seemed to work is opening the flood gates of the mucus reservoir.  That knocked the snot out the enemy.  Of course, it's a bit of a nuisance.  The detritus of war seeps from my nasal cavities.  Mom and Dad have been real troopers during this trying time of conflict.  I was impressed to see Dad joining the effort in keeping the nasal passages clear of obstructions. 

I have been victorious.  I obliterated the enemy, fired my worthless army, hired some new soldiers.  They speak English and chew Big League.  I don't think I can go wrong.  No pictures this time.  I'm recovering from battle, trying to get the crew to close the reservoir gates....just returning to normal.

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