All Aboard!
What an exciting day! In fact, I’m still on the adrenaline high. Mom thinks one of the kiddos who joined us on our adventure snuck me a Twizzler. No, it’s not sugar.
This morning at nine o’clock, Mom and three wives set out for downtown Seoul to pick up some furniture from the army base. Dad had arranged for Mom to borrow a Ford F150 from a friend. Finally, I got to ride a real vehicle. I even had to ride in my car seat. Normally, around here, Mom just gets in the back seat and holds onto me. That’s only if we’re driving on base. If we drive outside the wire, I have to be American legal, not Korean.
This was Mom’s first time to drive outside the wire, and while she was rather confident, I had my doubts. She kept reassuring me that we would probably be the largest vehicle on the road, “Jack, you know those little Kia cars we see driving around? Well, Ford trucks eat them for lunch.” I felt better about venturing into the chaos. Plus, our truck had a nice Texas A&M Former Students’ Association sticker on the back window. Gig’em!
We followed another wife who had a smaller car, a Honda Accord. We had heard that Americans should drive defensively on Korean streets and that Koreans disregard most of their own traffic laws. The latter is true. So, if the latter is correct, the former is halfway wrong. Throw out courtesy, respect, and kindness. Usher in pushiness, bullying, and superpower egotism. Apparently, American servicemen frequently refer to the bus lane as the “bus and superpower lane.” Well, we didn’t race down the bus lane, but we did bully ourselves into lanes. Heck, it was either act like a truck or be left on the side of the road.
After about an hour of driving, we reached our destination. Mom and Dad had picked out a coffee table at the Chosun Gift Shop, a shop run by Army officers’ wives. These wives import very nice items from all over the Orient, and they have been doing this for years. In addition to picking up the coffee table, I got the most amazing thing ever—a wooden train shelf!! Mom had been looking for shelves for my room. Stores wouldn’t ship to our address from the States. She had all but given up. Then, she saw this! I knew she and Dad had talked about it, but I had no idea that I’d get it. Oh boy! It’s perfect. As the Koreans loaded the truck with my train, I was grinning from ear to ear.
Getting the train was the best part of my day, but I have to admit that lunch ran a close second. We ate at the base Burger King. All of the other kids with us ran around on the play gym, but I chose to sit in my SRV and chomp on a biscuit. This time, Mom wouldn’t give me a French fry. Disappointing, I know. But, Burger King wasn’t the highlight of lunch. I’m more high-class than that! A Korean lady sitting nearby must have noticed that. She approached Mom, showed her a business card, and asked if I’d be interested in modeling. FINALLY, someone recognizes my potential! Mom acted like she didn’t understand what the lady was talking about. I knew immediately. The other wives quickly said, “Sorry, we’re not from Seoul. We’re from Osan.” There went my dreams. Quashed. As soon as the lady had mentioned modeling, I had already decided that I’d tell Uncle W first.
Maybe, once Mom realizes how much college costs, she’ll let me model and earn some dough. At least, she could let me contribute for the diapers and my favorite: YoBaby Yogurt.
The drive back to Osan was interesting. It was the beginning of rush hour in the second largest metropolitan area in the world, and Mom was driving a loaded truck. Other wives had bought furniture too. Well, luckily, there was an ocean of cars, and we had to drive very slowly. The truck must have looked like an ugly duckling, a shark swimming with minnows, a lion amongst zebras, a white person on the Korean subway, a German Shepherd in a Chihuahua puppy mill.
We made it safely home, but Mom said, “Never in my wildest dreams! Had someone told her in college that she would one day be driving an Aggie’s Ford pickup with her kiddo in downtown Seoul, South Korea, she would have looked at them and asked, ‘What are you smoking?!’”
This morning at nine o’clock, Mom and three wives set out for downtown Seoul to pick up some furniture from the army base. Dad had arranged for Mom to borrow a Ford F150 from a friend. Finally, I got to ride a real vehicle. I even had to ride in my car seat. Normally, around here, Mom just gets in the back seat and holds onto me. That’s only if we’re driving on base. If we drive outside the wire, I have to be American legal, not Korean.
This was Mom’s first time to drive outside the wire, and while she was rather confident, I had my doubts. She kept reassuring me that we would probably be the largest vehicle on the road, “Jack, you know those little Kia cars we see driving around? Well, Ford trucks eat them for lunch.” I felt better about venturing into the chaos. Plus, our truck had a nice Texas A&M Former Students’ Association sticker on the back window. Gig’em!
We followed another wife who had a smaller car, a Honda Accord. We had heard that Americans should drive defensively on Korean streets and that Koreans disregard most of their own traffic laws. The latter is true. So, if the latter is correct, the former is halfway wrong. Throw out courtesy, respect, and kindness. Usher in pushiness, bullying, and superpower egotism. Apparently, American servicemen frequently refer to the bus lane as the “bus and superpower lane.” Well, we didn’t race down the bus lane, but we did bully ourselves into lanes. Heck, it was either act like a truck or be left on the side of the road.
After about an hour of driving, we reached our destination. Mom and Dad had picked out a coffee table at the Chosun Gift Shop, a shop run by Army officers’ wives. These wives import very nice items from all over the Orient, and they have been doing this for years. In addition to picking up the coffee table, I got the most amazing thing ever—a wooden train shelf!! Mom had been looking for shelves for my room. Stores wouldn’t ship to our address from the States. She had all but given up. Then, she saw this! I knew she and Dad had talked about it, but I had no idea that I’d get it. Oh boy! It’s perfect. As the Koreans loaded the truck with my train, I was grinning from ear to ear.
Getting the train was the best part of my day, but I have to admit that lunch ran a close second. We ate at the base Burger King. All of the other kids with us ran around on the play gym, but I chose to sit in my SRV and chomp on a biscuit. This time, Mom wouldn’t give me a French fry. Disappointing, I know. But, Burger King wasn’t the highlight of lunch. I’m more high-class than that! A Korean lady sitting nearby must have noticed that. She approached Mom, showed her a business card, and asked if I’d be interested in modeling. FINALLY, someone recognizes my potential! Mom acted like she didn’t understand what the lady was talking about. I knew immediately. The other wives quickly said, “Sorry, we’re not from Seoul. We’re from Osan.” There went my dreams. Quashed. As soon as the lady had mentioned modeling, I had already decided that I’d tell Uncle W first.
Maybe, once Mom realizes how much college costs, she’ll let me model and earn some dough. At least, she could let me contribute for the diapers and my favorite: YoBaby Yogurt.
The drive back to Osan was interesting. It was the beginning of rush hour in the second largest metropolitan area in the world, and Mom was driving a loaded truck. Other wives had bought furniture too. Well, luckily, there was an ocean of cars, and we had to drive very slowly. The truck must have looked like an ugly duckling, a shark swimming with minnows, a lion amongst zebras, a white person on the Korean subway, a German Shepherd in a Chihuahua puppy mill.
We made it safely home, but Mom said, “Never in my wildest dreams! Had someone told her in college that she would one day be driving an Aggie’s Ford pickup with her kiddo in downtown Seoul, South Korea, she would have looked at them and asked, ‘What are you smoking?!’”
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