Ludendorff
I visited the Seoul Zoo yesterday with Mom and Dad. Last time I went, Locke, Mountbatten, and Albert put together a package for family members. Since they never received a thank-you note, they didn't send one with me this time. Apparently, they don't correspond with "ungrateful jerks." Yep, wow.
So, the highlight of my trip was adopting a stray hippopotamus named Ludendorff. Probably the best way to introduce him is to include this transcript of the interview/interrogation/chat that Mountbatten, Albert, Horatio, Locke, the Sand Crane, and the Flamboyant Flamingo subjected him to. They wanted to make sure he wasn't a North Korean informant Sheesh, what a welcome!
Location: Seoraksan Tower, South Korea
Locke: "Good Evening, sir. And, please state your name."
Ludendorff (strong German accent): "Guten Abend, sir. My name is Ludendorff."
Locke: "Ludendorff, sir, dictatorship or democracy?"
Ludendorff: "Who is Benjamin Franklin? Wait, actually who is Thomas Jefferson?"
Locke: "No, Ludendorff, this isn't Jeopardy. This is a serious interview."
Ludendorff: "What do you mean? Would you like to discuss political theory?"
Locke: "Sure. Which do you prefer? Dictatorship or democracy?"
Ludendorff: "Prefer to live in or prefer to discuss?"
Locke: "Never mind. Would you consider yourself a political realist or idealist?"
Ludendorff: "Realist"
Locke: "Zhukov or von Stauffenberg?"
Ludendorff: "Naturlich, von Stauffenberg!"
Albert: "Cheetohs or Doritos.....or....um.....Fritos?"
Ludendorff: "Fried Pork Rinds"
Locke: "Albert, man, wait your turn. Ludendorff, Great Britain or Spain?"
Ludendorff: "Switzerland"
Albert: "Locke, done. My turn. Ludendorff, do you have a girlfriend? If so, where does she live?"
Ludendorff: "Ja, San Diego."
Flamboyant Flamingo: "No Way! Do you think she would know Marselle?"
Albert (turning to Flamboyant Flamingo): "Seriously, dude, pipe down."
Mountbatten: "Orange Julius or tea?"
Ludendorff: "Root Beer"
Mountbatten: "Fair enough. John Wayne or Clark Gable?"
Ludendorff: "Bruce Willis."
Mountbatten: "Ludendorff, man, you're supposed to say John Wayne."
Sand Crane: "My turn. Calvin and Hobbes or Gone with the Wind?"
Ludendorff: "The Far Side."
Sand Crane: "Who is Harry Potter?"
Ludendorff: "I don't know."
Sand Crane: "Good call."
Flamboyant Flamingo: "Gap or Under Armour"
Ludendorff: "What's wrong with you?!"
Locke, Sand Crane, Mountbatten: "No kidding."
Locke: "Dogs or cats?"
Ludendorff: "Dogs"
Albert: "Chicken or Beef?"
Ludendorff: "Bison"
Albert: "Monopoly or Clue"
Ludendorff: "Siedler...I mean, Settler"
Albert: "Baseball or Golf"
Ludendorff: "Who watches the grass grow?"
Locke: "Kepler or Britney Spears?"
Ludendorf: "Who's Britney Spears?"
Locke: "Is Pluto a planet."
Ludendorff: "No, but don't tell the kid."
Mountbatten: "Republican or Democrat?"
Ludendorff: "Neither."
Mountbatten: "Green or Tea Party?"
Ludendorff: "Don't you mean black or green?"
Locke to Mountbatten: "He's German."
Mountbatten: "BMW or Mercedes"
Ludendorff: "BMW"
Mountbatten: "Ford or Chevy"
Ludendorff: "No comment."
Mountbatten: "Porsche or Corvette?"
Ludendorff: "Bugatti Veyron"
Sand Crane: "Pizza or Enchiladas?"
Ludendorff: "Enchiladas"
Sand Crane: "Guacamole or Sour Cream?"
Ludendorff: "Guacamole"
Locke: "Patton, Montgomery, or Rommel?"
Ludendorff: "MacArthur"
Albert to Locke: "Geez, why do you have to be so serious?! Give the dude a break."
Albert: "Mt. St. Helens or Mt. Vesuvius?"
Ludendorff: "Olympus Mons"
Sand Crane: "F-16s, F-18s, or F-15s?"
Ludendorff: "F-35"
Locke: "Final, very important question, Ludendorff. Have you ever played chess?"
Ludendorff: "Yes."
Locke, Sand Crane, Mountbatten, Flamboyant Flamingo, and Albert, "Ok. You're in."
Mountbatten (to Horatio): Horatio, what the heck? Didn't you make a list of questions?"
Horatio: "I have one question. Do you like sharks?"
Ludendorff: "Nope."
Locke, Sand Crane, Mountbatten, Flamboyant Flamingo, and Albert, "Good. That settles it. He's in. Give him the password. Hey, Pete, can you get him setup with the password?"
Locke: "Ludendorff, I'll get the kid to get you an Orange Julius. His mom stopped buying root beers a while back."
So, the highlight of my trip was adopting a stray hippopotamus named Ludendorff. Probably the best way to introduce him is to include this transcript of the interview/interrogation/chat that Mountbatten, Albert, Horatio, Locke, the Sand Crane, and the Flamboyant Flamingo subjected him to. They wanted to make sure he wasn't a North Korean informant Sheesh, what a welcome!
Location: Seoraksan Tower, South Korea
Locke: "Good Evening, sir. And, please state your name."
Ludendorff (strong German accent): "Guten Abend, sir. My name is Ludendorff."
Locke: "Ludendorff, sir, dictatorship or democracy?"
Ludendorff: "Who is Benjamin Franklin? Wait, actually who is Thomas Jefferson?"
Locke: "No, Ludendorff, this isn't Jeopardy. This is a serious interview."
Ludendorff: "What do you mean? Would you like to discuss political theory?"
Locke: "Sure. Which do you prefer? Dictatorship or democracy?"
Ludendorff: "Prefer to live in or prefer to discuss?"
Locke: "Never mind. Would you consider yourself a political realist or idealist?"
Ludendorff: "Realist"
Locke: "Zhukov or von Stauffenberg?"
Ludendorff: "Naturlich, von Stauffenberg!"
Albert: "Cheetohs or Doritos.....or....um.....Fritos?"
Ludendorff: "Fried Pork Rinds"
Locke: "Albert, man, wait your turn. Ludendorff, Great Britain or Spain?"
Ludendorff: "Switzerland"
Albert: "Locke, done. My turn. Ludendorff, do you have a girlfriend? If so, where does she live?"
Ludendorff: "Ja, San Diego."
Flamboyant Flamingo: "No Way! Do you think she would know Marselle?"
Albert (turning to Flamboyant Flamingo): "Seriously, dude, pipe down."
Mountbatten: "Orange Julius or tea?"
Ludendorff: "Root Beer"
Mountbatten: "Fair enough. John Wayne or Clark Gable?"
Ludendorff: "Bruce Willis."
Mountbatten: "Ludendorff, man, you're supposed to say John Wayne."
Sand Crane: "My turn. Calvin and Hobbes or Gone with the Wind?"
Ludendorff: "The Far Side."
Sand Crane: "Who is Harry Potter?"
Ludendorff: "I don't know."
Sand Crane: "Good call."
Flamboyant Flamingo: "Gap or Under Armour"
Ludendorff: "What's wrong with you?!"
Locke, Sand Crane, Mountbatten: "No kidding."
Locke: "Dogs or cats?"
Ludendorff: "Dogs"
Albert: "Chicken or Beef?"
Ludendorff: "Bison"
Albert: "Monopoly or Clue"
Ludendorff: "Siedler...I mean, Settler"
Albert: "Baseball or Golf"
Ludendorff: "Who watches the grass grow?"
Locke: "Kepler or Britney Spears?"
Ludendorf: "Who's Britney Spears?"
Locke: "Is Pluto a planet."
Ludendorff: "No, but don't tell the kid."
Mountbatten: "Republican or Democrat?"
Ludendorff: "Neither."
Mountbatten: "Green or Tea Party?"
Ludendorff: "Don't you mean black or green?"
Locke to Mountbatten: "He's German."
Mountbatten: "BMW or Mercedes"
Ludendorff: "BMW"
Mountbatten: "Ford or Chevy"
Ludendorff: "No comment."
Mountbatten: "Porsche or Corvette?"
Ludendorff: "Bugatti Veyron"
Sand Crane: "Pizza or Enchiladas?"
Ludendorff: "Enchiladas"
Sand Crane: "Guacamole or Sour Cream?"
Ludendorff: "Guacamole"
Locke: "Patton, Montgomery, or Rommel?"
Ludendorff: "MacArthur"
Albert to Locke: "Geez, why do you have to be so serious?! Give the dude a break."
Albert: "Mt. St. Helens or Mt. Vesuvius?"
Ludendorff: "Olympus Mons"
Sand Crane: "F-16s, F-18s, or F-15s?"
Ludendorff: "F-35"
Locke: "Final, very important question, Ludendorff. Have you ever played chess?"
Ludendorff: "Yes."
Locke, Sand Crane, Mountbatten, Flamboyant Flamingo, and Albert, "Ok. You're in."
Mountbatten (to Horatio): Horatio, what the heck? Didn't you make a list of questions?"
Horatio: "I have one question. Do you like sharks?"
Ludendorff: "Nope."
Locke, Sand Crane, Mountbatten, Flamboyant Flamingo, and Albert, "Good. That settles it. He's in. Give him the password. Hey, Pete, can you get him setup with the password?"
Locke: "Ludendorff, I'll get the kid to get you an Orange Julius. His mom stopped buying root beers a while back."
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